Divorce jokes

1 2 3 4 | Page 5 | 6 7

Next divorce jokes »

A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big kiss, says she'll see him later and walks away. His wife glares at him and says, "Who the hell was that?" "Oh," replies the husband, "she's my mistress." "Well, that's the last straw," says the wife. "I've had enough, I want a divorce." "I can understand that," replies her husband, "but remember, if we get a divorce it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Infinities and Lexuses in the garage and no more yacht club. But the decision is yours." Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm. "Who's that woman with Jim? " asks the wife. "That's his mistress," says her husband. "Ours is prettier," she replies.

Rating: 4.8 |

A hillbilly walked into an attorney's office wanting to file for divorce.
Attorney: "May I help you?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I want to get one of those dayvorces".

Attorney: "Well do you have any grounds?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I got about a hundred acres."

Attorney: "No, you don't understand, do you have a case?"

Hillbilly: "No, I don't have a Case, but I have a John Deere."

Attorney: "I mean, do you have a grudge?"

Hillbilly: "Yea, I got a grudge. That's where I park my John Deere."

Attorney: "No sir, I mean do you have a suit?"

Hillbilly: "Yes sir, I got a suit, I wear it to church on Sundays."

Attorney: "Well sir, does your wife beat you up or anything?"

Hillbilly: "No sir, we both get up about 4:30 in the morning."

Attorney: "Well, is she a nagger or anything?!?!?!?"

Hillbilly: "No she's a little white gal, but our last child was a nagger. That's why I want this dayvorce."

Rating: 4.2 |

Question: Why is divorce so expensive?
Answer: Because it's worth it.

Rating: 2.6 |

My husband and I divorced over religious differences.
He thought he was God, and I didn't.

Rating: 2.8 |

A ninety-year-old couple decide to get a divorce. They go to the judge and say, "Judge, we want a divorce."
The judge says, "You've been married 70 years and now you want to get a divorce? Why did you wait so long?"
The couple say in unison, "Well, we wanted to wait until the kids were dead."

Rating: 3.0 |

Next divorce jokes »

1 2 3 4 | Page 5 | 6 7

Browse all the jokes by category:

  • Aardvark jokes

  • Accountant jokes

  • Answer me this jokes

  • Ant jokes

  • Apple jokes

  • Aviation jokes

  • Baby jokes

  • Banana jokes

  • Bar jokes, beer, booze and fun!

  • Barbie doll jokes

  • Bath jokes

  • Beauty jokes

  • Bed jokes

  • Bicycle jokes

  • Biologist jokes

  • Bird jokes

  • Birthday jokes

  • Blind jokes

  • Blonde jokes

  • Book title jokes

  • Brother and sister jokes

  • Burger jokes

  • Bus jokes

  • Business jokes

  • Cannibal jokes

  • Car and train jokes

  • Cat jokes

  • Children jokes

  • Christmas jokes

  • Clinton jokes

  • College jokes

  • Computer jokes

  • Cow jokes

  • Cowboy jokes

  • Criminal jokes

  • Dance jokes

  • Dead and dying jokes

  • Dentist jokes

  • Dinosaur jokes

  • Divorce jokes

  • Doctor and nurse jokes

  • Dog jokes

  • E-mail jokes

  • Easter jokes

  • Elephant jokes

  • Ethnic jokes

  • Face jokes

  • Farmer jokes

  • Firefighter jokes

  • Fishing jokes

  • Food jokes

  • Frog jokes

  • Ghost jokes

  • Gorilla jokes

  • Hair and bald jokes

  • Halloween jokes

  • Heaven and hell jokes

  • History jokes

  • Horse jokes

  • Humor jokes

  • Hunting jokes

  • Idiot and fool jokes

  • Insect jokes

  • Internet jokes

  • Journalist jokes

  • Judge jokes

  • King Kong jokes

  • Knock Knock jokes

  • Lawyer jokes

  • Letter jokes

  • Lotto jokes

  • Marriage jokes

  • Men jokes

  • Mental health jokes

  • Military jokes

  • Money jokes

  • Monster jokes

  • Mouse jokes

  • Movie and TV jokes

  • Music jokes

  • Old age jokes

  • Parent jokes

  • Pig jokes

  • Police jokes

  • Political jokes

  • Rabbit jokes

  • Religious jokes

  • Restaurant jokes

  • Salesmen jokes

  • School jokes

  • Snake jokes

  • Snowman jokes

  • Space jokes

  • Spelling jokes

  • Sport jokes

  • Teeth jokes

  • Telephone jokes

  • Time jokes

  • Travel and tourist jokes

  • Vampire jokes

  • Various animal jokes

  • Waiter jokes

  • Weather jokes

  • Witch jokes

  • Women jokes

  • Yo momma jokes

  • Zodiac jokes

  • Zoo jokes
  • ...or read some samples at jokes directory.